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110 Good Questions to Ask to Increase Intimacy

Communication is one of the keys to increasing intimacy in a relationship. We put together good questions to ask to help strengthen and deepen that bond.   

Good questions to ask to (increase intimacy)


 In the beginning of our relationships we want to learn everything about them. This is when we decide if we are going to ibe good together as a couple. Asking questions helps to learn these important things about each other. 


As our relationship progresses we think that we know everything about our partner, but this isn’t true because we are always changing and hopefully growing. 


We change our views and what we want out of life. That is why our good questions to ask, helps both new and longer term couples increase the intimacy that is necessary in keeping our relationships strong.


We always want our partner to know us the best.


 Asking questions is a great way to make sure that as we change, we make sure that we keep maintaining the same feeling of closeness.


We all know what it feels like having a conversation with someone that really doesn’t know us, we feel separate.


And the more separate we feel, the harder it is to get someone to really know us. When this happens it tends to push relationships apart.


This is why using “prompts” such as questions help so much in making it feel effortless. Especially when you add good questions to ask to your date nights!


Many of our good questions to ask are for both girls and guys…so check in each category when you make your list of questions.


intimate questions for couples- closeness has nothing to do with distance


Good questions to ask a girl


1. Do you think that we do a good job of trusting each other?


2. Is there anything that we can do to improve how we trust each other?


3. What do you think are the most important qualities in a partner?


4. Who are you closest to in your family?


5. Whose relationship do you look at and admire the most?


6. What is the most annoying thing that I do in our relationship?


7. What do you think we could do to make our relationship stronger?


8. What changes if any would you make if you had a windfall of money?


9. What do you fear the most about our relationship?


10. Are you a thrill seeker? What does that mean to you?


11.What do you value most about people that you let into your life?


12.What would you consider cheating?


13. Do you believe in heaven?


14. What makes you really happy?


15. What do I do that turns you on the most?


16. Are you good with saving and spending?


17. What do you think is the perfect date night?


18. What are the greatest goals that you would like to achieve?


19. When you are angry what is the best way to help you feel better?


20. When you are afraid, what can I do to make you feel like you can handle anything?


21. When you don’t want to talk, what is the best way to act to help you?


22. Is there something we used to do that you miss?


23. Who do you look up to or admire?


24. What movie made you cry?


25. What stands out from your childhood?


26. How do you picture your life with children, assuming that you want them?


27. What did you think the first time that you met me?


28. What family traditions are important to you or what new ones would like to create?


29. How would your closest friends describe you?


intimacy is connecting in a deeper way -intimate questions to ask


More good questions to ask a girl


30. When did you first fall in love with me?


31. Is there something that you always wanted to ask me but never have?


32. What chores do you hate to do? What would you like to pay someone to take care of?


33. What is your favorite thing about me?


34. What are some of your happiest memories?


35. What would you consider your greatest strength?


36. What keeps you up at night? 


37. Do you think that you are a confident person?


38. What could we do to help you worry less?


39. What did you learn from your parents’ relationship?


40. In the famous book “the 5 love languages” what way do you prefer to give and receive love?

  1. words of affirmation 2. Acts or service 3. receiving gifts 4. quality time 5. Physical touch


41. Do you feel appreciated? 


42. If time travel was possible, what time period would you visit?


43. Who would you call at 3 in the morning if you needed to?


44. If you could choose the perfect dream life, what would you be doing?


45. Is there anything that you would like to do in your life that you are not doing now?


46. What is on your bucket list?


47. Do you have any fantasies that you would like to explore?


48. What have you done in your life that you are really proud of?


49. When do you feel the most at peace?


50. What would be your ideal date night?


51. How would you describe me to someone?


52. Would you like to be more adventurous in bed? What would you like to try?


53. What are you most thankful for?


good questions to ask girls


Good questions to ask a guy


54. What do you think is the most fun thing that we do as a couple?


55. What do you think we could do to make our relationship stronger?


56. What would you like to do most on date night?


57. What change would you make in your life if you had all the money you wanted?


58. Do you believe that you can do anything?


59. What are your biggest strengths?


60. How do you handle criticism?


61. What do I do that turns you on? What else could I do?


62. What is something that I do that annoys you most?


63. Do you have a temper? What gets you the most angry?


64. What does your life look like in 5-10 years?


65. What were some of your family traditions that you would like to carry on?


66. What are some of your life’s goals?


67. What do you fear the most about our relationship?


68. What has excited you lately?


69. What would your choice be for your favorite date night?


70. What was the most difficult thing that you have had to deal with in your life? What did you learn?


71. What qualities do you value most in a partner?


72. Are you adventurous? How do you define that in your life?


73. Is there something that we did often that we don’t anymore?


74. What values are the most important in a partner?


75. What are the happiest memories that come to mind?


76. What type of movies do you like?


77. Where is your happy place?


78. What are your thoughts on money? Are you a spender or more of a saver?


79. When you are sad what is the best way to help you?


80. When you feel anxious what is the best way to help you feel better?


good questions to ask guys


More good questions to ask a guy


81. What did you like about how your parents raised you? Would you want to raise your children in the same way?


82. Who do you admire and why?


83. If someone asked, how would you describe my personality?


84.  Who is a professional role model that has inspired you?


85. Do you give to charity or volunteer? What charities do you feel strongly about?


86. What are your feelings about religion? Have your beliefs changed over time?


87. Which one of your relatives are you closest to?


88. What in your life are the most thankful for?


89. Is there something that you would like to know, but were nervous to ask?


90. What are your greatest pet peeves that people do?


91. What do you remember most about when we met?


93. What chores do you like most to do around the house?


94. What would you like to pay others to take care of around the house?


95. What trait or behavior do you like least about me?


96. What are the things that you worry about most?


97. If you could create your perfect life, what would it look like?


98. What is the favorite thing that I do in bed? What would you like to do more of?


99. What was the greatest lesson that you learned from your parents’ relationship?


100. What do you think makes us so good together as a couple?


101. In the famous book “the 5 love languages” what way do you like to give and receive love?

  1. words of affirmation 2. Acts or service 3. receiving gifts 4. quality time 5. Physical touch


102. How can I make you feel more appreciated?


103. What are your most vivid memories of your childhood?


104. What would you like to learn more about? Maybe a hobby or something for career improvement.


105. What are you proud of that you have accomplished?


106. What would you consider cheating?


107. Have you ever cheated on your partner in any previous relationships?


108. How important is family to you? Do you always want to be there for them?


109. What did you learn from past relationships and heartbreak?


110. Are you satisfied with the amount of intimate time that we spend together? If not, what are your suggestions to make it better?


What questions should couples ask each other?


We have 100’s of fun questions for first dates to 36 questions to fall in love. Choose the questions that fit your relationship best. Many can be used for different situations, so you can pick and choose from the different question lists. 


What are some intimate questions to ask a guy?


We have got you covered. Try using our good questions to ask for increased intimacy in this article. Below we have more questions to fit your specific relationship.



intimacy in relationships- dream without fear, love without limits


How do you ask a tough relationship question?


If there is something specific that you want to know the answer to, then it’s not too difficult to ask them that specific question. Just ask your partner for a moment to talk.


It’s more difficult to just jump into a full blown conversation. It’s better to either just let the conversation flow from the question that you would like an answer to or to turn it into a game such as asking intimate questions on your date night.


How do you start an intimate conversation?


Ask your partner to schedule a time that you would like to talk about some things that have been on your mind. 


If you decide to do it this way,  you both will enter into it with some hesitation. People tend to get nervous when someone says “I want to talk.”


 You can lighten the mood by saying at dinner/lunch  “ I wanted to ask you something….”


If it’s possible we prefer making it less intimidating by asking questions in a game form. The reason is that you learn more almost effortlessly. You can just add any questions to your list that you would really like the answers to.


How you decide to attack this will depend on what you are trying to find out. If you want to know if they are seeing someone else, (for example) that doesn’t need to be turned into a game! Just ask…

Never guess or assume what someone is thinking or feeling. Ask the question! 


Conclusion good questions to ask 


Day to day conversations are usually about work and what you are planning to eat. Maybe the typical, “how was your day?” It’s normal, which is why you need  specific ways to stay connected.


 If your partner says, “let’s sit down and talk about how we really are feeling.” Honestly, that doesn’t sound like something that you really want to dive right into. 


Take our tips and turn it into something that feels more like a game. You will find out more in a less intimidating way, guaranteed.


Visit our many posts that offer fun questions to ask, we have over 600, so you won’t run out for a quite a while!


Funny Would you Rather Questions to ask Couples 

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21 Questions to Ask a Guy to Start a Conversation

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