Whatever negative and positive thoughts that we have can come out in our expressions and affect
the way we are perceived and hurt our love life.
Are you sabotaging your love life?
Dating can be challenging and the truth is that so many of us are actually sabotaging our very own love life! The reason for this is because of how we see ourselves and our perspective.
How do you see yourself? Do you see yourself as a loser at love? Or as a person that always attracts the wrong type of person? Or how about someone that is the “smart” or “funny” one.
All of these labels that you give yourself are how a potential date may see you. It’s very important what labels and boxes that we put ourselves into, try to be aware of what you say to yourself and how it may limit you.
Online dating reality
Online dating has created a sense that there is an unlimited supply of people to date or that there is always someone better.
This has made people not put much effort into each person which is the worst way to really find someone. No one wants to feel that they are not special or easily replaceable. Trying to find a partner cannot be treated as if you are looking for a commodity.
We want a new person to see us as a together, fun person that they would love to get to know better. THIS is the best way to approach your love life.
Don’t take it so seriously, have fun and be playful
These are all qualities that will keep them coming back for more. Think of yourself as an onion, reveal yourself in layers!
What are the rules for dating?
1. Decide what qualities that you want in a partner not just what you do not want.
2. Let go of the past and remember that each new relationship is brand new and not an extension of a previous relationship.
3. Give people a chance! Not every first date is perfect and attraction can grow so don’t say no to a second date so quickly.
4. Make sure that you are being social, you cannot meet anyone in isolation.
5. Be respectful, if you want to connect with someone, disrespect will ruin it quickly. Try not to get into too deep diving conversations, we tend to disregard people easily when first dating. There is plenty of time for that although I do not mean deal breakers. Any deal breakers should be weeded out asap.
6. Be confident that you are worth getting to know.
7. When first dating, you do not know each other well meaning that you are NOT invested, emotionally. So it is very easy to have a one night stand.
Its likely that if you want something more, you will have to wait until you are both emotionally invested. That is different for every couple, only you will know when that time is.
8. Waiting three days to communicate is BS.
You decide the dating rules for you…
All of us have been through some negative experiences, but these events do not define us. We decide that so make it positive! We have a great article first date do’s and don’ts that can also help.
There is a business saying “fake it till you make it.” This means that you may not be where you want in your personal or professional life yet, but you are on your way.
Although you may not be the most confident person when it comes to dating, you know you are one hell of a person and worth getting to know better (you needed to hear that again!)
The attitudes and thoughts we have, make all the difference in life and in dating, so have attitudes that serve you. The next time you are on a date, tell yourself that whatever happens, you are going to have fun.
Read more Dating articles to help with communication when dating!